How to believe in yourself (even if you're super sensitive)
But elevating your self-worth and shifting your mindset is essential if you want to build your life around what makes you happy rather than feel guilty and backpedal every time you try to make a change.
The good news is self-belief is a mindset anyone can develop.
We have so much power to release the pains of the past and rewrite the stories we tell ourselves into ones that uplift and empower us.
Soul Scroll Journals is all about helping people get to the root of the emotional pains creating self-doubt and criticism, and healing those pains with love and understanding.
We want to help you heal, understand yourself and find inner freedom so you can create a life as unique as you are.
Many of us are so focused on self-doubt, dwelling on our shortcomings, mistakes and flaws that we miss how amazing we are.
Faith is a choice, and so is fear.
Yet criticism and rejection undoubtedly hurt.
It can feel easier to hide or quit or settle for lives less than we deserve rather than face this pain.
But faced in the right way, the pain can teach us where we criticize and reject ourselves — which is the real reason outside rejection and judgment hurt.
Facing failure, disappointment and rejection ultimately builds inner strength, perhaps even getting to the point where others may throw blows or reject us, but we are so strong in who we are that it no longer causes us pain.
That's why in the Listen to Your Heart guided journal, you'll examine your relationship to these things in order to grow so strong nothing can hold you down.
I've definitely received my fair share of judgment over the years.
I’ve been told I’m annoying, my voice is annoying, I email too much, charge too much, that my views are “dangerous,” to take my posts down, that I’m wrong for cursing, and a million other things.
Receiving these comments hurt, but they pale in comparison to some of the comments I’ve seen tossed other people’s ways.
I think that’s the hard thing about learning how to believe in yourself — the things we fear will probably happen.
We will experience failure on the way to success. Strangers will judge us, and sometimes make those judgments known.
Depending on the people you have in your life, they may support and encourage you, but they might not.
Sometimes I’ve wanted to wrap myself in bubble wrap and never leave the house again.
I’ve often wondered if I’m just too sensitive, if I should just give everything up and go work a 9 to 5.
But that’s not the life I want to live.
I need to live according to my unique inner clock and flow. I need the freedom to travel and work on projects of my choosing.
I know I have gifts the world deeply needs, as you do too, and these gifts and desires will never see the light of day if I choose fear.
Ultimately, I don’t want to face myself on my dying day and realize that I chose cowardice over courage.
So over the years, I’ve learned how to love myself unconditionally, believe in myself, and am now working on elevating my self worth. (Journal on that coming soon!)
With that, here is my unique take on learning how to believe in yourself:
1. Embrace your sensitivity.
In martial arts, one technique is to use the opponents’ force against them.
So instead of blocking a jab, the fighter would deflect it, essentially allowing the opponent’s momentum to continue in a different direction, throwing them off balance.
When fighters resist things, they enter into a battle of brute strength where one relies solely on their own power.
This creates fatigue. The strongest person wins.
This is similar to life. When we fight and resist life or ourselves, it IS possible to win. But the result is not necessarily peaceful victory.
We may feel tired. We may have created conditions out of harmony with the universe, if the universe allows us to win at all.
We live at odds with ourselves when what we need to do is resolve inner conflicts and find peace.
In an effort to believe in yourself and create the life you want, you may be tempted to blame your sensitivity.
But sensitivity is a gift. It's only at odds with self-belief when unhealed past pains and low self-worth run the show.
Sure, sensitive people may have more to heal because they bruise more easily, but healing your inner world will also thicken your skin.
This allows you to keep your big heart full of compassion while not allowing it to destroy your chance of realizing your dreams.
Through the inspiring daily readings and thought-provoking journaling prompts inside Listen to Your Heart, you’ll identify (and re-write) the stories and inner conflicts causing the war within.
This greater self-understanding helps you love yourself more while increasing your confidence and ability to believe in yourself.
2. Practice amazing self-care.
It might seem odd to put self-care into an article about learning how to believe in yourself, but I’ve found this is really, really important.
When I am hungry or stressed or overwhelmed, not expressing a boundary or slacking on my spiritual practice, I am much more likely to fall into spirals of self-doubt or comparison.
Conversely, when I feel doubtful, I’m more likely to lapse in self-care — skipping my morning ritual or exercise because I’m so ‘focused on work and don’t have time.'
Bullshit! Self-care is a basic necessity of life.
Caring for ourselves, creating a rhythm for our lives that involves healthy food, water, sleep, fun and relaxation, purposeful work, and time with loved ones calms the nervous system, creating a sense of deep serenity and security within.
Self-doubt can cause lapses in self-care, but one way to ease back into self-belief is simply to take care of yourself.
When you feel good, you’ll think good, empowering thoughts.
One thing I love about the Listen to Your Heart guided journal is that in it, you’ll connect not only to what you need to feel vibrant and alive, but also be supported to identify the best flow for your day.
You’ll spend time understanding why the voices your head sometimes make you feel guilty for doing what you want, or why you feel like you don’t have time to care for yourself.
Doing this deeper inner work is really important for making lasting change, and understanding why you self-sabotage when you inevitably do.
Creating self-awareness is the most important gift you can give yourself, and Soul Scroll Journals are your unbiased guide to find out who you are and what you believe so you can become who you want to be.
3. Hold space for NOT believing in yourself.
I’m all about positive affirmations and reprogramming my thoughts from limiting to empowering.
However, it’s also important to hold space for where you are.
The fastest way to move through an experience of panic, feeling not good enough, frustrated or sad is to fully be with it. Let it exist.
NOT giving yourself space to feel is resistance. Resistance separates you from your heart and creates thoughts in the family of “shoulds.”
- “I should believe in myself more. I’m such a failure.”
- “I should be happy. What’s wrong with me?”
- “I should be further along by now.”
- “I should know what I want, but because of all these things happening in my life, it’s not possible.”
These statements don’t reflect your true self. You are an extraordinary person, a slice of infinity sandwiched in skin, with so much love and so many gifts to offer the world.
However, our human selves typically react to these statements in one of two ways:
First, most people don't have the awareness they're even thinking these thoughts.
(It's like fish being unaware of the water they're swimming in.)
This is why journaling is so massively important. I believe everyone should have a journaling practice. How can you create true happiness without self-reflection?
Humans who react without awareness continue believing these thoughts, which of course influences every decision and sadly limits their experience of life.
Another common scenario is that people immediately shift to a positive affirmation, trying to remind themselves of what they want to believe.
Saying affirmations you don't believe damages your self-belief because it creates resistance and inner conflict, worsening the war within rather than resolving it.
It places you at odds with yourself as you fight to believe something you don't and blame yourself for not believing it.
Think of driving a car: If it's in reverse, you must first shift into neutral before shifting into drive.
Our psyches are the same. You must create space to identify what's blocking you from believing the positive thought before the affirmation can help you rather than hurt you.
Soul Scroll Journals are expertly designed to support you through this process.
An important thing to know is that underneath these negative beliefs lie deeper, bigger, more fundamental fears like:
- “I don’t have the ability to create what I want.”
- “There’s something wrong with me, and that’s why I have such a hard time.”
- “I’m not worthy of love if I do what I really want.”
- “I don’t deserve good things.”
In Listen to Your Heart, you’ll identify these deeper fears and give them space to exist so you can move beyond them in a way that honors your sensitivity rather than placing you at war with it.
This is incredibly healing. It also creates so much space to fully, deeply believe in yourself so you can continue with Step 4.
4. Remember the truth.
After you hold space for the pain, doubt and fear, you will feel a sense of inner peacefulness.
Then, you get to decide: What new story would you like to write?
We focus on this a lot in the Listen to your Heart guided journal.
The daily readings and journal prompts will help you get super honest about how you feel, and the areas in your life causing you frustration.
You’ll also be guided to write a new story.
- “Even though I feel not good enough, I love myself deeply and completely.”
- “I’m doing a really good job.”
- “I trust myself. I know who I am, and what I want. I don’t apologize or compromise on that.”
- “It’s more than okay - necessary even - to ask for help so I have time for what matters to me. My needs and desires matter.”
- “It’s safe to follow my heart even if others doubt me or think I’m crazy or hell, even if I think I’m crazy.”
Repetition is really important with this process. You've been creating negative thought patterns for decades, and it can take time to reprogram your brain.
That's why daily journaling, reaffirming the thoughts you want to believe, is such a powerful way to learn how to believe in yourself.
And that’s exactly what you’ll do in the Listen to Your Heart journal here!
It features a carefully designed process to help you shift from confused to clear about what you want to create in life and what will make you happy!
I poured my heart and soul into creating this journal for you, and I know you will love it!
All the love,
Founder, Soul Scroll Journals