What feeling stuck actually means
It means you’re standing at a threshold between the new and the old. The new has yet to make its way into your life but the old no longer feels good.
Feeling stuck is a portal between chapters of your life, and it’s very important that you treat it accordingly because the truth is some people never move beyond this.
Some people spend decades of their lives feeling frustrated, wanting something else without quite knowing what, never digging into what this feeling is telling them, instead resisting the experience and hoping life will end this chapter for them if they wait long enough.
Take it from me — an incredibly slow learner —when we feel stuck it’s because life is asking us to evolve.
Fortunately the growth on the other side of this experience is boundless.
The times in my life when I have felt massively, mind-bogglingly stuck but followed the steps I’m about to share with you have been the very times I’ve made significant forward movement in my life.
These steps are simple, but not easy, and I suggest you try them because they work.
We are alive to learn, and if we don’t allow ourselves to evolve into what may feel scary, we’ll continue to feel stuck because we’ve outgrown what the past has been.
Ready to turn the page? Read on.
Here is what you need to do to shift from feeling stuck to knowing what you want:
1. Accept where you are.
I know this feels crazy difficult. After all, your biggest desire is to get out of this place.
How can you accept this feeling?
There are a lot of ways, but one of the most important is to identify the five main fears keeping you in resistance.
It's the fear that's keeping you stuck in what no longer works, creating the sense you don't know what you want.
One of the five main fears is that your situation is unchangeable, which is a feeling of powerlessness. The natural reaction is to resist this powerlessness, when to reclaim your power, you actually need to accept the feeling.
In this acceptance, you gain the power to move forward based on how life actually is rather than how you wish it was.
On Day 2 of the Listen to Your Heart guided journal, I talk about the four other big fears keeping people feeling stuck, unable to break free and create a life that makes them happy.
As you release these fears and write a new story, you will stop feeling stuck and reclaim a sense of incredible freedom and power.
You'll realize deep in your heart you can create anything you want, and with that realization, you'll receive the next steps to create a brand new chapter in your life.
There is wisdom and beauty here, even in feeling stuck, and the universe will open the gates for you to move forward just as soon as you take a deep breath and accept where you are.
2. Identify inner conflicts
When you’re feeling stuck in life, chances are two opposing forces are pulling you equally in two different directions — forward and backward.
Maybe you can't let go of the past or feel nervous about evolving into something new.
It's very important to patiently explore your attachments to the past so you can move on in a loving, gentle way rather than getting mad at yourself for not creating change or buying into limiting beliefs that it's not possible for you.
Or perhaps your desires are conflicted, with one part of you wanting, for example, to eat healthy, but your husband, who you cook for most of the time, hates vegetables, and you can't figure out how to reconcile the two.
Trust that every conflict has a creative solution of the highest good. There is no problem that can't be solved by thinking differently.
Giving yourself space to identify and resolve these inner conflicts will help you stop feeling stuck and start creating forward momentum.
If this resonates, you'll love Day 5 of the Listen to Your Heart journal when we explore how inner conflicts are stopping you from making changes that would light your heart up like the Griswold's house at Christmas.
You'll be guided to figure out how you can satisfy your true desires in a way that honors the ways you value showing up in the world.
Of course, this also requires you know your values and priorities, which you'll of course explore in Listen to Your Heart, as well.
3. Question the roles you play.
One common reason people feel blocked in knowing what they want is because of the roles we play and what we think they require.
Our ideas of what makes a “good” partner / daughter / mother / father / boss / employee / entrepreneur often get in the way of doing what we really want.
Mothers feel selfish for taking time away from their families for self-care or to pursue their creative desires.
Entrepreneurs get stuck in strategies that aren’t a right fit for them because they’re blinded by what everybody else is doing.
Adult children feel guilty setting boundaries with parents even if interactions leave them feeling drained and resentful.
Underneath these problems are limiting beliefs. They feel true and frustrating to fight against, but that’s why being stuck is actually a good thing.
The inner work of getting unstuck involves gifting yourself permission to give in to what you actually want instead of buying into lies stealing your happiness and personal growth.
This isn't about being selfish and never doing anything for others, but instead redefining what matters, what's important and creating space in your life for you — the real you.
Not the version worried that wanting certain things makes you a bad person.
Throughout Listen to Your Heart, you'll get clear on your values and priorities so you can support those who are important to you from a place of love while creating plenty of space for your own needs and passions.
(If you died tomorrow, someone else would do the things you're worried about doing for others. What really matters to you?)
4. Get clear on who you are and what you want.
Creating this vision is important because you’ll allow yourself to move forward as soon as you have a clear desire and intention to do so, AND you’re no longer emotionally attached to the fears and inner conflicts holding you back.
Removing the emotional attachment holding you back allows you to move forward with ease and grace.
But creating this clear vision can feel overwhelming! A lot of people feel like they don’t know what they want.
One common reason for this is simply because people often don’t create the necessary space to tune into these desires.
It can feel scary to admit what you want. It opens you up to fears of failure and loss.
(In order to create a new chapter, you must close the old chapter. Walking into the unknown can feel scary even if the past isn’t something you enjoyed.)
This is why during the first week in the Listen to Your Heart guided journal, you’ll spend time getting clear on what exactly what fears and limiting beliefs are stopping you from acknowledging what you truly want.
After clearing space, it’s equally as important to sit with yourself, to get clear on what you value, what your priorities are and what makes you unique.
Give yourself permission to remove the limits and ask yourself what kind of life you truly want to live.
Weeks 2 through 4 in the journal are about clarifying who you are and what you want, designing your next level, and becoming limitless, which invites you to consider your relationships to success, money and your inner guidance.
One thing I love about Listen to Your Heart is that it invites you to expand from exactly where you are.
I firmly believe that creating your next chapter is about expanding so fully and joyfully into your life today that the next chapter has no choice but to appear.
This allow you to stay grounded and grateful in what you have while reaching for more.
So often when people start manifesting a big dream, the hugeness of the dream paralyzes them.
That staggering divide stops you from taking action because you don’t know how to get from here to there.
It can also create a lot of suffering if your desires make you so future-minded that you start resisting the present, feeling like it’s not good enough.
Your life is right here, right now.
It’s SO important to walk this balance of loving what is while reaching for more.
You’ll spend a lot of time in Listen to Your Heart getting clear on what makes you unique, what you value, and how you can create a life that perfectly suits you.
Throughout, you’ll be supplied with amazing journaling prompts to help you create a vision for your life while honoring your fears and the very real inner conflicts keeping you feeling stuck.
This inner work will help you break free so you can create something new in your life. And best of all, these are tools you can revisit over and over whenever you’re feeling stuck.
You’ll now know this feeling is an invitation for you to evolve, to step more boldly into a life of success and significance.
It’s not necessarily about living a BIG life, but living a UNIQUE life. The life that’s designed perfectly for you
To create that life, you’ve got to listen to your heart, and this guided journal will show you how.
All the love,
Founder, Soul Scroll Journals
I reached out this post by pinterest and it really touched me, but for me is really hard not to feel stuck. I’m in jail and the only thing I have, besides journaling, is thinking about the future and keeping the hope to get back with my family.
Thank you, thank you, thank you! I feel great relief after reading this article to know that I’m not alone in these “stuck” feeling patterns. I’m overjoyed to learn this is a good thing! Checking out Listen to Your Heart now :)
thank you for clarifying this, i have been stuck and didnt even know that i was
Thank you. I love how you described that being stuck was a good thing. I’ve always thought of it as negative but now that I know what it means has given me a great sense of optimism and has opened me up to possibilities.
Thank you for creating this tool. I have been stuck for 8 years and my life is passing me by