3 ways to trust yourself and remove self-doubt
But finding your unique path through life requires another essential ingredient: Learning how to trust yourself.
This means trusting your desires, your feelings and your intuition.
These are your headlamps to peer into the unknown, allowing you to navigate through the uncertainty that is life to find your unique path.
Yet we’ve been told throughout history not to trust things we can’t see.
We’ve been told our desires are selfish and slanderous, our feelings weak and burdensome, and our intuition flaky and illogical.
No wonder so many people have trouble trusting themselves, not to mention finding their unique path in life.
Without trusting themselves, people feel confused, lost and uncertain. At war with themselves, wanting something else while feeling guilty for having that desire in the first place.
That isn’t why you are here.
You're not alive to feel guilty for being who you are.
You are here to discover the infinite potential within you and play with it. You are here to dig deep inside of yourself and find your unique magic and give that magic to the world in only the way you can.
You are here to express unique perspectives and gifts, infusing them with a unique energy the world has never seen before and will never see again because we are all unique in our own special way.
To become the unique, radiant person that you truly are requires learning how to trust yourself.
But that can feel hard.
I remember a few years ago when I was freelancing, I had a really good month and planned a trip to Costa Rica.
All I’d ever wanted to do was create a location-free business so I could travel, and here I was, finally doing it!
But my husband was really freaked out. He was supportive, but freaked out. He’s not a big traveler and felt terrified someone would mug or kill me.
Before I knew it, I was so scared I almost canceled the trip.
I felt terrified even though I wanted to go so badly, and had traveled extensively alone before I got married. (It’s like after getting married, the “I am a wife,” identity kicks in and so many women lose essential parts of themselves!)
So many emotions mixed in my body, heart and mind left me wildly confused and uncertain.
All the times in the past I thought I was following my heart but things didn’t work out ran through my mind.
This seemed like a life or death situation. What should I do?
Finally I had a few major realizations, found my confidence, went on the trip and had an amazing time.
It was one of the most memorable times of my life, as are most times when we feel afraid but do it anyway.
Ultimately I went because I trusted myself.
I trusted my intuition and senses to keep me safe.
I trusted that most people are good and kind and not out to get me.
Trusting ourselves is everything.
It's not just about the occasional, awesome experiences, but our every day lives.
Because I’ve learned how to trust myself, I've been able to go from feeling lost and confused about my direction in life to finding my perfect, unique self-expression and building a business — Soul Scroll Journals — around those gifts and my lifestyle desires.
I've had to leave behind so many lucrative jobs and creative endeavors, including my course and coaching business, to find this. Without knowing, loving, and trusting yourself, none of this other stuff works.
On a personal level, whenever a situation or friendship didn't work out before, I'd always blame myself, never feeling good enough.
I used to be so self-conscious, always questioning every little thing I said and wondering if I was cool or interesting enough for people to like me.
I tried to be the perfect friend, the perfect daughter, the perfect wife, and it left me feeling so depressed and disconnected from who I was and what I wanted.
Finding my true self has been a long road, but I created the Self-Love guided journal to help you get there much faster than I did.
Knowing I’m exactly who I’m meant to be, doing what I am meant to be doing, walking the path I am meant to be walking is priceless.
Trusting yourself is an important part of this foundation.
This is what I want to talk about today.
How to trust yourself:
First, let’s talk about why so many people doubt themselves.
We’ve been trained to believe that we’re not powerful. That we’re helpless against the influences of the world.
We're conditioned to believe we must dress, act, think and work in certain ways to be accepted, and that outside authorities know what's best for us.
There's good reason we believe this: Centuries ago, people were literally burned at the stake for being too different.
Having a connection to your inner knowing or the universe used to be considered sacriligous because religious authorities were the only ones with that power.
We dimmed our true power to stay safe.
Collective, inherited trauma and past life experiences held in the emotional body have many people still afraid to stand out too much.
And for good reason: We're as polarized as ever today, and society, depending upon which group you identify with, has established 'right' and 'wrong' ways to think about life.
People still get ostracized and made fun of for being too different.
These fears are real.
But the risk of buying into them is that we stay stuck in the chains of others' expectations, never finding the courage to be truly free.
This is why we have to love and accept ourselves in order to find our true path in life.
When you love and trust yourself, you gain the courage to be who you really are, and stand proudly in that until you attract the right people and situations to you.
This is why the work in the Self-Love guided journal is so important.
Ways to trust yourself:
1. Trust your feelings.
Knowing yourself is really important when it comes to trusting your feelings.
While all feelings give you important messages about what’s going on beneath the surface, and all are valid, feelings don’t always reflect the truth.
This may seem contradictory, so let me explain.
Emotions are your soul’s response to how your ego, your personality, is interacting in the world.
Let’s say you feel angry about a certain situation. Anger relates to feelings of powerlessness and is often a call to resurrect boundaries. It’s also often a protective mechanism to protect a deeper hurt.
With the Costa Rica trip, for example, there was a part of me that felt angry at my husband for being afraid. I took on his fear as my own fear, and it almost made me miss out on an awesome experience.
In reality, I was making his fear my fear, giving my power away in search of his approval, and that anger was a sign for me to reclaim my power through being true to myself.
Because I was aware of my emotions and have over the years created an amazing relationship with them, I was able to understand what was happening.
I'm not special with this knowing. I've simply done the work. Your inner wisdom has messages for you, too.
The Self-Love guided journal shows you exactly how to tap into them.
2. Trust your intuition.
We’ve been trained for eons to trust outside authorities over ourselves, and that's why it can feel so scary to walk an unconventional path.
It's not the path itself that feels so scary, but the fear that walking it will make you unlovable.
Yet the unconventional path is where your unique purpose and authentic self-expression lies.
This is why it's so important to love and trust yourself.
I would never have created my purpose-driven business if I hadn’t followed my intuition down a long, circuitous path that started with freelance writing and yoga teacher training and somehow ended up here.
Most people never find their unique path, but walk the almost path (which really does not feel any better than the totally wrong path!) because they don’t trust themselves or know how to find the answers within.
My intention in creating the Self-Love guided journal was to help you feel good enough exactly as you are and find your unique path to fulfill your potential.
3. Trust that you’re a good person.
So many people, but women especially, worry that they’re selfish or bad people, and this creates horrible, soul-destroying situations.
People don’t set the boundaries they want to set, which leaves them overwhelmed and without the time, energy or money to please themselves.
And even when they do have the time, energy or money to spend on themselves, they feel incredibly guilty about it, ruining all chances of fun.
(Sometimes this guilt manifests as finding stupid things to complain about or starting fights about nothing.)
They war with their thoughts and emotions, worrying if they were nice enough or said the wrong thing or were wrong because they set a boundary and someone got mad.
Trusting your innate goodness, and healing the past pains perpetuating these struggles that keep too many women locked in lives that don’t reflect their true, unique magic, is essential to create the life you’re meant for.
When you understand yourself, you gain the ability to look at all situations more objectively. Not just through the eyes of past conditioning, or whatever pain or fear you’re feeling in the moment, but through the eyes of your higher self.
But first you must create a relationship with your higher self.
You must learn to feel good enough exactly as you are.
This is what you’ll develop in the Self-Love guided journal.
It's 30 daily readings that will help you understand the many beautiful layers of you coupled with 30 days of thought-provoking journaling prompts to connect you more deeply to your true self than you ever have before.
This is my calling to offer these journals to the world. This book contains some of my best work, and I know you'll love it!
All the love,
Founder, Soul Scroll Journals
PS — "Better than therapy!"
Amy H. was kind enough to leave a review, and that was the title of her incredible testimonial.
Here's what she wrote:
"I have both Play With The Day and Self Love guided journals.
I just hopped on Amazon and bought Listen to Your Heart! Play with the Day is exactly how I look at things each year to plan and guide me however it’s all there in print and I can now look back at it to make sure I’m staying the course daily, monthly and annually. I loved it so much, I bought it for my co-worker!
I am 1/2 way through Self-love and feel lighter, more centered and my energy has changed! I am so excited to have Listen to your heart when I complete this course ❤️."
Thank you, Amy!
I love hearing about your experiences as you work with the journals! Thank you all so much for your support!